What the hell are you starin' at?!

You know something? I've really got to stop thinking about "Duckman". Why? It's a fine, Emmy-nominated, razor-sharp piece of animated goodness. Why would I want to stop thinking about it? Simple. The more I think about it, the more pissed-off I become that it's not on DVD.

I know I have no say in that; that's entirely Paramount's call...but still, the opportunity to have the show available in my steadily growing DVD collection would make for a superb Christmas present (people can settle for the bootleg set that pops up on eBay, but I like to think that true fans would refrain from dirtying their hands on such a thing).

Besides, wouldn't you want such gems of dialogue preserved forever on an official multi-disc set:

Cornfed: Once again, the U.S. is spending millions to oust a puppet they spent millions to get into office. They'll spend more millions on the coverup to hide having spent those millions and even more millions to discredit members of the media who report otherwise. It's a good thing they print their own money.

Duckman: Do you know what my father's last words were?
Cornfed: 'Careful, son, I don't think the safety's on'?
Duckman: Before that!

Duckman: Hey, canteeno boy. I need a tall glass of water. My sister-in-law and her birthday suit just gave me a libidoectomy.

Besides, if the medium is good enough for the likes of "Super-Friends", "Game Over", "It's Punky Brewster", any number of "Scooby-Doo" incarnations, "Pet Alien", "Poochini", "Sabrina: the Animated Series", "Super Duper Sumos", "The Wacky World of Tex Avery" and "Quack Pack"...then shouldn't it be good enough for "Duckman"?

By the way, I've heard that online petitions don't usually work, but I'm hoping that the inverse is true for this one.