Mr. Cellophane

In a location adjacent to a place in a city of some significance, what comes out of my head is plastered on the walls of this blog.

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Okay. Either I really impressed the crap out of my interviewer or God is tired of my constant whining (smart money's on the latter), but I have a new (albeit temporary) job. Suck my knob, Bank of America! I'm back in the game!

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Monday, October 27, 2014

That bit I mentioned about my files being incomprehensible? It's because of a virus created by cyberterrorists. In exchange for the low, low price of $500, they'll give me the means to unlock a key to restore my files. As I'm still without a job (and as I only really need a few of the files that were tainted), let me just tell those individuals to fuck their own faces, fuck their mothers and fuck their mother's faces, for good measure.

Speaking of impossible to pay, I get a letter from my credit card company telling me that, because I missed a payment (one payment in years of loyal service), the credit limit is being cut in half. I might be able to pay the money I owe for this month, but, without some kind of employment, I don't know about next month and the ones after.

I've applied for roughly 50-60 jobs in the time since I submitted my two weeks notice at the store (and I just may end up begging for that position back if I'm still jobless at Thanksgiving). I'm still in dire financial straits. This isn't some weedy quote-unquote "nice guy" whining about why "none of those stuck-up bitches will date me!". This is a college-educated man wondering why he can't get something as simple as a part-time job.

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Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Today has been one of the most frustrating days I've yet suffered.

One too many Egg McMuffins has led to an...unfortunate situation downstairs. It's not cancer, but it hurts to sit down.

If that was enough, things would be painful, but then I go to my computer (the old one) to work on some documents. Much to my horror, they are deleted and incomprehensible. This is years of film music lists, fanfictions, notepads for scripts down the drain.

I suppose I could rebuild from scratch, but it is a pain in the ass, much like the literal one menacing me.

How I long for the carefree days when not having a job was the worst thing to happen to me.

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Saturday, October 18, 2014

A few weeks ago, I sent off a number of query letters to various agencies. Instead of sending them a query for a script that might catch someone's eye (a mistake I won't repeat the next time), I sent them queries for a well-written but not spectacular thriller, hoping to catch some of the residual (and inexplicable) success of No Good Deed.

Last night, one of the agencies responded. Granted, it was a rejection letter (some crap about not taking unsolicited material), but at least someone had the sack bag testes to tell me 'no'.

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Sunday, October 12, 2014

I love L.A.

I just couldn't bring myself to post four straight YouTube filler posts (in fact, that's a new rule at the blog) and the less said, the better about my attempts at getting anything off the ground for 'Lost in the stacks'.

I'm still stomping out for jobs, though I have two aces in the hole that might help me achieve my dreams, both of which I'm putting a Halloween deadline on.

Now, I've been thinking about the two times I've been out to Los Angeles. I've decided on making a list of reasons that I'd like to live out there.

10. Lipton Brisk fruit punch - Very minor league, but imagine how amazed I was to find this in 7-Eleven...and how crestfallen I was to not find it on this side of the Rockies.

9. living like an adult - It'd be nice to have a living situation where I'm beholden not to my parents, but to myself.

8. a chance to start over - No one knows who I am in Los Angeles. I can become a brand new person; the me I've always longed to be.

7. the sights - On the off chance that some bigwig wants me 'in town and out of my sight', I'd have plenty of places to go, plenty of things to see. L.A. is a big town, after all.

6. seeing celebrities - This pretty much speaks for itself.

5. the revival theaters - I've had scattered experiences with seeing old movies on the big screen in my life. Imagine doing this every night...

4. Amoeba Music - Without question, the best record store I have ever been in. The soundtrack section is enough to make one cry.

3. the eats - Breakfast. Lunch. Dinner. Snacks. Never a dull moment.

2. proximity to the studios - If I'm planning on having any kind of film career, I need to be in the environment.

1. sunshine all year round - What I wouldn't give for a January day where I wouldn't have to clear snow off of my car and I could walk around in shorts.

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Monday, September 29, 2014

"B'oh!"

In case anyone cares, no, I didn't watch the "Simpsons"/"Family Guy" crossover. To paraphrase a line from the glory days of the former, 'why don't you take that idea and mail it to 13 years ago, when I might've cared?'. Sadly, neither show is at its best right now and two rancid tastes are likely to taste rancid together. Still, purely in a 'curiosity'/'train wreck' kind of way, I bet it was a ratings smash.

What's more, you're telling me that the real thing is any funnier than this? Not bloody likely.


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Friday, September 26, 2014

Another day, another remnant of my childhood. Back in the mid-90s, Showtime devoted Thursday nights at 10 to a series of movies under the umbrella of 'Roger Corman Presents'. Some of these were remakes of past Corman films (Piranha, Not of This Earth, The Wasp Woman) and some were originals (Virtual Seduction, Black Scorpion). None of these were what you'd traditionally call 'good', but - to a 14-year-old boy in the throes of puberty - they provided the requisite thrills and T 'n A that the target audience desired. There were two openings used for it. This is one. Not sure where the other disappeared to.

That opening music always held my attention. I learned some years later, thanks to soundtrack boffin Ford A. Thaxton, that the music was entitled "It's Clobberin' Time", composed by brothers Eric and David Wurst for Corman's infamous The Fantastic Four.

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