Mr. Cellophane

In a location adjacent to a place in a city of some significance, what comes out of my head is plastered on the walls of this blog.

Sunday, August 23, 2015

Get out of my head, AV Club*!

Just to show that I've watched far too much television in my life, allow me to share with you some of the expressions I use in my everyday life:

"Oh yeah. It's all coming together." (The Emperor's New Groove) - Expressed in the (apparent) belief that one of my plans will go off without a hitch. Needless to say, it usually doesn't.

"Hello, nurse!" (Animaniacs) - As an admirer of the animated series and an appreciator of the female form (you know, a pervert), I can't not use this expression when I see a beautiful girl.

"Daaaaaamn, Gina!" (Martin) - One of several 'come on!' expressions to be found here.

"Hubba-what?" (Sheep in the Big City) - The show (lamentably missing from DVD; WTF, Warner Archive?!) overdid it in season 2, but it still functions as an exclamation of puzzlement at an insane occurrence.

"I hear that, Renegade." (The Simpsons) - This is probably not on anyone's top 500 conversation seasoners from this show, but can you think of a better or funnier way to express agreement?

"Kids. No respect." (The New Batman Adventures) - Okay, the full line is 'Kids these days; no respect.' Even so, the line (thanks to Michael Ironside's delivery) makes for an all-purpose, low-key head shake at people's ignorance.

"Marvy-poo!" (The Pruitts of Southampton) - As detailed in the amusing Vic Mizzy theme song, this show had a good premise (a rich family losing it all, but trying to keep up a pretense of respectability). Hearing it on Percepto's invaluable "Suites and Themes" album, I was particularly struck by Phyllis Diller's exclamation 'Aren't they marvy-poo?'. Very much of its time, but I use it quite often.

"Splee!" (Catscratch) - Simply, something to show happiness, courtesy of one of the most underrated Nicktoons and the character of Waffle, voiced by my fave Kid in the Hall, Kevin McDonald.

"Not a problem, Rat." (Bananas in Pajamas) - Whoa. How'd this get in here? What? I didn't watch this show every morning before I went off to high school. What gave you that idea?

"Who wrote these questions? Forrest Gump?" (Murphy Brown) - I wasn't a huge "Murphy Brown" viewer, but I did catch an episode featuring this line, said in response to the stupidly easy.

"Wow! Ask and ye shall receive!" (That's My Bush!) No one seems to like this Trey Parker-Matt Stone spoof of sitcoms, but I thought it was a hoot. This line is a highlight, a perfect way to show that if you want something, you sometimes get it.

"Yep, yep, yep. Ahhhh!" (Darkwing Duck) - Everything's been taken care of, or so I lead myself to believe by saying this.

"You're breakin' mah balls, Mike." (South Park) - 'Come on!', number two.

"You're killin' me, Smalls." (The Sandlot) - 'Come on!', number three. (Some stuff, I can't deal with.)

"Any day now, Superstar." (Sky High) - I'm not as patient as I pretend to be, so if someone's taking longer than they ought, the words of Coach Boomer echo in my mind. Sure are a lot of Zacks in the world.

"Clean cup! Move down!" (Alice in Wonderland) - Usually, when I want to get to something in a hurry.

"Why do You hate my trains?" (The Simpsons) - From my lips to God's ears, I sometimes ask Him why things don't go as planned.

"That's what I thought you said." (SpongeBob SquarePants) - An abrupt way to get someone to my point of view.

"Crazy doodle bitch." (Cool World) - Bitches be exasperating, right?

"Today's gonna be a great day." (Betsy's Wedding) - Despite a terrific cast (Alan Alda, Madeline Kahn, Molly Ringwald, Burt Young, Ally Sheedy, Catherine O'Hara, Joe Pesci), this 1990 comedy is largely forgotten today except by people flipping around television and stopping in curiosity. Usually, I say this in portent of a good omen (and in Alda's voice; otherwise, I'm wasting oxygen).

* - I'd been prepping this post for years and look what shows up this weekend: What's your go-to pop-culture phrase? Unbelievable.

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Let it never be said that random chance can't yield positive results.

So, I'm driving back to work yesterday and looking forward to chowing down on the food I just got from Burger King. My phone rings (because I always have my phone on on lunch break). I answer it (risky, I know). It's a girl from T-Mobile. She tells me I could get a free tablet (well, free inasmuch I'd be paying the taxes on it and a subsequent charge added to my phone bill each month).

Cut to today (the closest time to take advantage). Following a movie that took a while to start - too many ads and no trailers - I was able to get my new tablet, on which this post is being made. My laptop has graduated from randomly freezing up to randomly restarting, so this tablet could not have come at a better time. I just hope that my routine isn't interrupted too much by it.

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Friday, August 14, 2015

Nearly three weeks since my last post. I'd love to say that it's because I'm working on something big...but if you believe that, you're obviously new here.

Just incredibly lazy, is all...but then again, I finished a draft of one script and put a high shine on another one for a contest that ends tomorrow, so how lazy can I be?

Also, it seems that I need to get a new laptop...again (protip: don't try to use your laptop while it's charging).

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