Mr. Cellophane

In a location adjacent to a place in a city of some significance, what comes out of my head is plastered on the walls of this blog.

Friday, March 30, 2012

Kind of looking forward to this year's "Script Frenzy". I use the qualifier 'kind of' as I have a basic idea for my script, but I'm unsure as to which direction to use: a road trip movie or a big lie movie (think Wedding Crashers, but less ridiculous).

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Saturday, March 24, 2012

Lost in the stacks. (Bad Girls)

I love comic books. I've been collecting for roughly the last decade. However, I'm not drawn toward traditional titles. Somehow, I gravitate toward limited run titles. These comics, more often than not, fall through the cracks and are forgotten, lost to time. This column aims to shine a light on these titles and, hopefully, make them some new fans...or draw out the old ones.

Let's face it: it's never easy being the new kid in school (it's never been me, but I imagine it's hard to endure), but that's just what Lauren has to deal with. Her first day sees her colliding with uber-nerd Ronald, as well as making the acquaintance of the popular girls - Ashley, Destinee, Brittany and leader Tiffany. The clique unknowingly ingests a strange liquid taken from the school's plumbing, bestowing them with awesome abilities.

I'm just gonna expose the elephant in the room: yes, this is Mean Girls with superpowers. What of it? (Of course, this predated the movie by half a year, so think of this as hearsay.) Sometimes, it's not the story you tell as much as how you tell it.

For the most part, the character work is good. One could quibble about the lack of dimension in the clique (and, now that I think of it, it would've been nice if their powers reflected some kind of inner flaw), but at least, they were entertaining to read, unlike a number of projects where the writers go so far with the bitchiness of the popular girls that you spend more time wishing gruesome deaths on them than being entertained.

Also, in re-visiting this for the first time in years, I'm struck by just how Ronald was presented. He's socially awkward, a science geek and into comic books. Surely, there were a couple more traits to be worked in? Still, it's kind of nice to see that his moral compass isn't always pointing north.

Lauren is a good lead; angry at herself for currying favor with the clique, but still trying to do the right thing. She makes a friend in snarky outsider Simone, who I really wish there was more of. Likewise, the hunky Caleb, who catches Lauren's eye.

Writer Steve Vance throws in a nice twist for Lauren that leads to many amusing moments in issue #3. Likewise, the aspect that the girls decide to use their powers for selfish exploits such as scoring beer and shoplifting outfits pleased me far more than if the girls had become a junior league clique of Star Sapphires.

Less effective is the rushed way that the story ties itself together in the last issue. (Having bought the issues in their original run, I was disheartened to see the cover tally for the issues go from '#3 of 6' to '#4 of 5' and, under the circumstances, I guess Vance did the best he could.) Just what were the agents ultimately searching for?

Another aspect that strikes me is the artwork. The realistic work by co-creator Jennifer Graves in the first issue stands in marked contrast to the cartoony work by Christine Norrie and J. Bone in subsequent issues.

This is a very fun title and well worth the search.

Grade: B+

Availability: The five issues were collected as a TPB, which can be purchased at

P.S. There's a moment in issue three where...I'm not sure if it was serious or a joke on the part of Vance, but...

Hope springs eternal, Simone.


Thursday, March 22, 2012

So it seems that John Carter is one of the (if not the) biggest box office flops of all time. As much as it breaks my heart (so far, it's the best movie I've seen all year), I can't say I didn't see this coming. Complete unfamiliarity with the source material + practically non-existent advertising = how could one not see this coming?

Some of the reviews were no help. I'm still galled by the fact that Owen Gleiberman gave the film a 'D' in last week's Entertainment Weekly, yet, not two pages later, he gave a 'B' to Tim and Eric's Billion Dollar Movie. If any critic deserves the Slappy Squirrel treatment, it's him.


Friday, March 16, 2012

From the "Old people...oy!" files: while on my lunch, I head for the magazine rack. There's an old guy there already. All I wanted was to confirm something for a future post. He picks up a magazine with a big-bottomed black chick on the cover. (Didn't catch the title, but I'm pretty sure the genre was hip-hop, not porno.) He waves it at me, believing me to be interested. My preference for white chicks notwithstanding, what kind of gesture is that for someone to make to a public?

He probably thinks I'm a fruit. Doesn't matter. In five years, I'll have a woman I want and he'll be worm food.


Saturday, March 10, 2012

The more movies come out of Hollywood, the more stuff I get to add to my list of shit I'll never put in any of my films. For example, my instincts told me to avoid this week's horror release Silent House. I have never been prouder of them.

I got the scoop from the AV Club's invaluable 'Spoiler Space' feature. The ickiness of the backstory would've been repellent enough, but the thing I'm referring to is this: I'm no cheerleader for humanity, but I doubt I'd ever have so much contempt for an audience as to give them a movie where a killer and their intended victim are one in the same.

Do I feel bad about spoiling this? Not terribly. This ain't exactly Ain't It Cool News. There are probably more letters in your first name than there are people who read this blog on a regular basis.

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Thursday, March 08, 2012

Had an eye appointment today after work, but, as there was plenty of time to kill, I decided to get some gas for the car and an oil change. I was told that there were issues with the filter and transmission that need to be straightened out. Problem is that those were way more expensive than I have budgeted, so they'll have to wait. Yet another sign that this screenwriting thing needs to be taken seriously, so I'll have enough money to get these things taken care of.

Still, the oil had been changed, the car is gassed up and, in seven to ten days, I'll have another pair of glasses. I guess I've learned to take the victories wherever you can get them.


Saturday, March 03, 2012


This morning, badges went on sale for San Diego Comic-Con. It seems that the people running the Con have learned quite a bit from last year's imbroglio and adopted a more organized style of selling the badges.

They went on sale at 11am EST. I missed my chance, mainly because I was at work. I wasn't as upset as I was last year, nor was I upset as I could've been. I had read the FAQ on what was to be done and realized that I'd have needed to block out a good three or four hours to wait for my opportunity.

This job has, more or less, cock-blocked me on this hoped-for ritual. Even if I wasn't working today and even if I was able to score a four-day pass, other people in my department have scheduled vacations for the whole of July. If this doesn't convince me to make a change in my life, nothing will.

Maybe it's for the best. The Twi-tards will likely be attending en masse. It's just a trip that separates me from around $1500 and it's not like I'd have run into a group of "How I Met Your Mother"-style "Wooooo!" girls who'd be willing to do 'anything with anyone'. Maybe.

At the very least, I could always post a fake trip just like I did last year. That worked out pretty well, don't you think?