Mr. Cellophane

In a location adjacent to a place in a city of some significance, what comes out of my head is plastered on the walls of this blog.

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Favorite movies of the decade.

As I hope I've made clear at this blog, I'm not the kind of guy who goes for movies that are a) arthouse, b) foreign, c) subtitled or d) independent. Something really has to appeal to me to get me to see it, quote it, buy it on DVD, watch it on cable even if I own it on DVD and, generally, love it. These are my favorite movies of the decade:

Big Trouble
(d: Barry Sonnenfeld; w: Robert Ramsey & Matthew Stone, based on the novel by Dave Barry; m: James Newton Howard)
Ensemble casts are like catnip to me, and this has to be one of the finest assemblages of talent I've yet seen. The dialogue, taken from the source in some instances, is a howl and the cast gives it their all. Don't let the airline hijacking in the latter third throw you. This is a gem.

Casino Royale
(d: Martin Campbell; w: Neal Purvis & Robert Wade and Paul Haggis, based on the novel by Ian Fleming; m: David Arnold)
Shamefully, I've only seen a handful of Bond movies, so I can't honestly judge if this is one of the all-time greatest. Still, it's a damn good movie, with a terrific performance by Daniel Craig.

Catch Me if You Can
(d: Steven Spielberg; w: Jeff Nathanson, based on the book by Frank Abagnale, Jr.; m: John Williams)
Not just a fun caper movie, but the story of a young man wanting a family, held together by a smashing, should've-been-Oscar-nominated performance from Leonardo DiCaprio.

The Emperor's New Groove
(d: Mark Dindal; w: David Reynolds, story: Mark Dindal and Chris Williams; m: John Debney)
Without question, one of the funniest animated movies of all time, and one of Disney's most underrated features. It bears repeat viewings to catch the many hidden jokes that one misses the first time around.

Hot Fuzz
(d: Edgar Wright; w: Simon Pegg & Edgar Wright; m: David Arnold)
An over-the-top action movie and a parody of over-the-top action movies. Ridiculously fun and amazingly quotable.

The Incredibles
(w & d: Brad Bird; m: Michael Giacchino)
Every 'best of' list ought to have at least one Pixar title on it. Funny, smart and exciting.

Inside Man
(d: Spike Lee; w: Russell Gewirtz; m: Terence Blanchard)
As I've said before (and will continue to say until it sinks in), there was already a perfectly fine Denzel Washington-starring remake of The Taking of Pelham One Two Three in existence...and without Tony Scott's meth-infused visual style (anyone bitching about the use of Lee's trademark shot ought to see a few Scott movies, if only to see how much more annoying things could've been).

Kill Bill
(w & d: Quentin Tarantino)
Like a modern-day grindhouse flick; cheesy, gruesome and compelling, with some wonderfully memorable sequences.

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
(w & d: Shane Black, based in part on the book "Bodies are Where You Find Them" by Brett Halliday; m: John Ottman)
A little unfair that one of the least-expensive projects with Black's name on it would struggle at the box office. Robert Downey, Jr. and Val Kilmer make a great team, and then there's the jaw-droppingly beautiful Michelle Monaghan. Now, where's the sequel? (Seriously, with Downey and Monaghan's stars rising ever higher and Kilmer's supposed retirement, it may already be too late.)

Kung Fu Hustle
(d: Stephen Chow; w: Stephen Chow, Tsang Kan Cheung, Lola Huo and Chan Man Keung; m: Raymond Wong)
Essentially a live-action cartoon (with appropriately cartoony CGI), and a damn fine one, packed with great, weird little gags.

The Road to El Dorado
(d: Don Paul & Eric 'Bibo' Bergeron; w: Ted Elliott & Terry Rossio; m: Hans Zimmer & John Powell)
Dreamworks' best animated feature. There, I said it. A splendid update of Hope and Crosby with lush animation, a terrific score (Note: I said score, not songs), and fine vocal work.

Speed Racer
(w & d: Andy & Larry Wachowski; m: Michael Giacchino)
It's weird that people level complaints about live-action adaptations of cartoons not being faithful to the source material, only to let this one flop for, what, being too faithful? Who knows? Still, I greatly enjoyed this movie: vibrant, exciting and humorous.

Team America: World Police
(d: Trey Parker; w: Trey Parker & Matt Stone & Pam Brady; m: Harry Gregson-Williams)
Mix a season of "Thunderbirds" with a Jerry Bruckheimer movie and...I guess you'd get this. Achingly funny, and filled with absurd little details.

That's the list. What of the next decade? Why did it take me so long to post this one? I don't know.

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Monday, January 25, 2010

Pretty tense time right now. Yesterday, I had to work, and I may have inadvertently done something that could cost me my job. Also, I'm on a liquid diet to prepare for tomorrow's colonoscopy. And Dreamcatcher's on in the background. I don't know what's happening here.


Wednesday, January 20, 2010

The film music of 2009.

As my bank account and several credit card companies might tell you, last year saw an embarrassment of soundtrack riches, both new and old.

My favorite scores of 2009:

Astro Boy (John Ottman - Varese): Ottman's first score for an animated film (and it's about time) is a delight, with a rousing main theme.
A Christmas Carol (Alan Silvestri - Disney download): I'm a sucker for Christmas carols in film scores, and Silvestri delivers that (and more) with his usual aplomb.
Coraline (Bruno Coulais - Koch): A colorful score that plays like an extension of Coulais' beautiful world music from Winged Migration.
Crank: High Voltage (Mike Patton - Lakeshore): This music (like the film for which it was written) may not be to every taste, but Patton's work is great fun for those who get into it.
Duplicity (James Newton Howard - Varese): Howard bestowed upon the underrated caper a score that's almost like an orchestral version of his fantastic Big Trouble.
Fantastic Mr. Fox (Alexandre Desplat - Abkco): Desplat's quirky, folksy score makes me wonder why it took so long to discover his talent.
The Informant! (Marvin Hamlisch - Silva): Hamlisch's bouncy score makes for one of the strongest elements of the biographical dramedy.
Public Enemies (Elliot Goldenthal - Decca): Goldenthal makes an impressive return to the scoring stage; easily the finest element of the uneven gangster drama.
Ponyo (Joe Hisaishi - Tokuma - Japan): As lush and lovely as one would expect from a Hisaishi score for a Miyazaki epic.
Sherlock Holmes (Hans Zimmer - Silva): One of the most off-beat scores of the year, and perhaps, one of the most fun.
Star Trek (Michael Giacchino - Varese): The cast of the Enterprise boldly went (I'm no Trekkie. Can't you tell?) thanks to Giacchino's lively action music and noble main theme.
Up (Michael Giacchino - Disney download): Giacchino's second score of the year is a multifaceted joy.

Other good scores:

Drag Me to Hell (Christopher Young), Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (Rolfe Kent), Julie & Julia (Alexandre Desplat), Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian (Alan Silvestri), Ninja Assassin (Ilan Eshkeri), The Princess and the Frog (Randy Newman), Taking Woodstock (Danny Elfman), 17 Again (Rolfe Kent), Trick 'r Treat (Douglas Pipes) and Where the Wild Things Are (Karen O. and Carter Burwell)

Some really nice unreleased scores:

The Great Buck Howard - Blake Neely (Neely, nice guy that he is, posted the entire score at his site. Still, a physical CD would be great.)
Hotel for Dogs - John Debney
The Invention of Lying - Tim Atack
Sorority Row - Lucian Piane
12 Rounds - Trevor Rabin

Favorite new CDs of 2009

Airplane! (Elmer Bernstein - LaLaLand): Surely, this is some kind of joke. No joke and don' know how it goes. Bernstein's straight-faced score for the parody classic is one of the year's biggest surprises. Looks like I picked the wrong year to save my money.

Back to the Future (Alan Silvestri - Intrada): Great scott! A release spotlighting Silvestri's classic score and a much darker take on the material? I know, this is heavy (okay, last reference to the movie in my description, I promise).

Bank Shot (John Morris - Kritzerland): One of the more obscure Morris comedy scores, highlighted by a fantastic circusy main theme.

Batman: Mask of the Phantasm (Shirley Walker - LaLaLand): Perhaps Walker's finest film work, with a rich assortment of melodies.

How to Murder Your Wife/Lord Love a Duck (Neal Hefti - Kritzerland): The complete score of Hefti's underrated "...Murder..." gets paired with his out-there work on "...Duck".

Innerspace (Jerry Goldsmith - LaLaLand): Joe Dante's movies always provided fine canvases on which the composer could work, and this is no exception; by turns, weird, heroic and delightful.

One Little Indian (Jerry Goldsmith - Intrada): Sometimes, it's nice to be surprised by something from which you expected very little, as with this engaging score for the nearly-forgotten 70s Disney adventure.

Re-Animator/Ghoulies (Richard Band - Intrada): Band's most famous (or infamous, depending on your point of view) score sees - let's hope - its definitive release, paired with a brief, though entertaining effort.

The Split (Quincy Jones - FSM): Interested in starting a collection of Jones scores? One could do far worse than this energetic slice of 60s funk.

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (James Horner - FSM): Horner's first big score, a lush and exciting work, receives a deluxe treatment. Perhaps, it's time for me to see the film.

Time After Time (Miklos Rozsa - FSM): One of Rozsa's last scores (and as good an entry point for anyone wanting to get into his music as one can ask), composed for the time-travel romance. (Not a bad year for fans of scores to Nicholas Meyer movies, I think.)

Twilight Zone: the Movie (Jerry Goldsmith - FSM): Three great Goldsmiths in one year (and that's not counting the ones I didn't buy!)? There is so much to love in this presentation of the anthology score. The heartbreaking theme for Mr. Conroy in "Kick the Can". "It's a Good Life's" chaotic 'Nancy Cartwright gets eaten by cartoon monsters' music. The sparse, creepy scoring of "Time Out". Just incredible.

My favorite pieces of film music:

"Clan McCullen" - G.I. Joe: the Rise of Cobra (Alan Silvestri)
"Discombobulate" - Sherlock Holmes (Hans Zimmer)
"Drag Me to Hell" - Drag Me to Hell (Christopher Young)
"El Huron" - Crank: High Voltage (Mike Patton)
"End Credits" - Coraline (Bruno Coulais)
"The Informant" - The Informant! (Marvin Hamlisch)
"Just Another Dead Rat in a Garbage Pail (Behind a Chinese Restaurant)" - Fantastic Mr. Fox (Alexandre Desplat)
"Main Title" - Taking Woodstock (Danny Elfman)
"Married Life" - Up (Michael Giacchino)
"Plane to Chicago" - Public Enemies (Elliot Goldenthal)

As the doors at certain studios have been kicked open, here is my silly little wishlist for 2010:

Anything!! (Amotz Plessner): Seriously, other people need to be made aware of Plessner's great talents. Addams Family Reunion. Deal of a Lifetime. His contributions to Digimon: the Movie. Hell, even Road House 2! (Yes, they made it.)
The Black Cauldron (Elmer Bernstein): Disney's been quite gracious with opening their vaults for their live-action scores. Their animation scores, not so much. The grip has to loosen sometime and, hopefully, Bernstein's gorgeous score will be first out of the gate.
Down Periscope (Randy Edelman): I've made my peace with the fact that it may be several years before the labels get to releasing any Edelman scores, but I do hope (it being from Fox and all) that this score (for David S. Ward's amusing Major League remake) gets considered.
Stay Tuned (Bruce Broughton): Broughton's score for the misfired fantasy-comedy is one of his lesser-known efforts, but it's quite entertaining, highlighted by an exciting main theme.
Take the Money and Run (Marvin Hamlisch): Hopefully, Hamlisch's almost-certain Best Score nomination (see above) will convince some label to search for and rescue this engagingly cartoony score for Woody Allen's directorial debut.

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Saturday, January 16, 2010

I got my schedule for next week and, incredulously, after tonight, I don't have to work again until Thursday. I love when stuff like that happens.

Of course, for something good, there is also something bad. Going to see Daybreakers the other day, I found that FYE, the store that has allowed me to expand my CD and DVD collections not insignificantly, is closing. Sure, it's a mad dash to take advantage of the savings, but there is the lingering thought that someone went and slapped a padlock on the gates of paradise. I really hope that whatever pops up in its place is just as good, if not better.


Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Been seeing a lot of birds flying around. I was under the commonly-held impression that birds flew south for the winter. It's been pretty cold around here (Buffalo winters, you know?), so I can only imagine that the north from which the birds escaped is way colder than this place. Shit, what a depressing thought.


Saturday, January 09, 2010

Random thoughts - "You're not the boss of me now!" edition.

The last year or so, I've been watching reruns of "Malcolm in the Middle" on FX, local television and Nick-at-Nite. Today marks the show's tenth anniversary. The list of observations about the show is shorter than I would've liked, as I've been busy with other pursuits, but here goes:

- In the episode "Cheerleader", Hal gives a speech to the boys about how relationships will go between women and men in their family. In hindsight, as he illustrated how insane and clingy a guy would get, I couldn't help but think, 'Did he call it with Malcolm or freaking what?' (cf. "Butterflies" and especially "Malcolm's Girlfriend").

- The episode "Living Will", where Hal was tasked with the choice of letting a neighbor live or having his life support cut off, ended with a scene where Lois and Hal talk about the solution he came up with. Strangely, they never mention what the solution was or how it was arrived at ("And everything you needed was available at Radio Shack?" "Everything but the hat."). To me, this'd be a cop-out on any other show, but it totally fits on this one.

- I'd have to say that, in watching the show, there was only one aspect of the show that was truly irredeemable - Jessica. Nothing against the actress, but I could never stand that frizzy-haired, manipulative C-word. As far as I'm concerned, the character (and, for that matter, the show) reached its nadir in the episode "Secret Boyfriend". The episode indulges two of my greatest pet peeves of TV watching: a girl who likes the main character, but not when anyone's looking and a girl who treats the main character like crap, but (we're led to believe) that's because they're too chickenshit to tell them how they really feel. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I fucking hate that shit.

- Sara Paxton ("Malcolm Dates a Family"), Emma Stone ("Lois Strikes Back"), Ashley Tisdale ("Jury Duty")'s amazing how many ingenues appeared on this show.

- The episode "Stilts" features Malcolm getting a job as a Lucky-Aide greeter on stilts, replacing the alcoholic Sam. When Sam comes back wanting his old job, the two of them are on stilts. The first time I saw Sam shuffling his feet like a boxer on stilts, it may well have been the hardest I've ever laughed at anything on television (and the moment that made me a fan of the show).

And, to extend this post a bit, here are twenty of my favorite "Malcolm" episodes, alphabetized for your protection:

Billboard - The boys manage to turn defacing a billboard of a stripper into a woman's rights protest.
Highlight: Reese's fantasy

Block Party - Apparently, the neighborhood throws a big party whenever Malcolm and his family go on vacation. Unfortunately, they came back early this year.
Highlight: Reese and Dewey's scam

Bride of Ida - Because of tyrannical Grandma Ida, Reese and Malcolm find themselves in a contest of manhood.
Highlight: any of the manhood trials and any of Dewey's 'accidents'

Buseys Run Away - When Dewey leaves his special class, his classmates disappear.
Highlight: the look on Lois' face when Dewey bites her leg

Chad’s Sleepover - Despite Hal's objections, Dewey invites one of his classmates over.
Highlight: "Pictures of things belong on the things they're pictures of."

Dewey’s Dog - Dewey finds a stray and uses it to get revenge on Malcolm and Reese.
Highlight: the appearance of Craig

Forwards Backwards - Reese and Malcolm get into a war of oneupmanship and pranks.
Highlight: any flashback to a prank and the goofy music by which it's accompanied

Hal Coaches - Hal tries to inspire Dewey's soccer team to victory.
Highlight: Malcolm becoming obsessed with a 'Sims'-like game

Halloween - Hal is convinced that the house is haunted after hearing about the murders that took place there long ago.
Highlight: "It's Jamie, isn't it?"

Living Will - Hal is tasked with deciding the fate of a neighbor: keep him on life support or pull the plug?
Highlight: Hal's from the neck up coma and the entire subplot with Craig

Lois Strikes Back - Lois gets revenge on the girls that humiliated Reese.
Highlight: "Tell me how I get."

Malcolm Dates a Family - Malcolm falls for a girl, but ends up beloved by her family.
Highlight: the entire subplot with Lois fighting a double-tipping restaurant, especially its conclusion

Malcolm’s Girlfriend - Malcolm gets a girlfriend...and grows fixated on her.
Highlight: the party at the end

Monkey - Craig's helper monkey soon tries to kill him.
Highlight: Hal vs. the monkey; sort of a pisstake of the middle segment of Terror Tract

Opera - Dewey is inspired to write an opera based on a spat between Hal and Lois.
Highlight: the tree landing (you'll know it when you see it) and pretty much any moment of the opera

Reese Joins the Army - Hal is accused of insider trading, Lois flips out and Reese...well, guess.
Highlight: the method by which Hal is acquitted

Reese’s Apartment - After going too far in an argument, Reese leaves home and gets his own place.
Highlight: the various reactions to Reese's latest act of malfeasance

Robbery - Lois and Craig are trapped at the mercy of two armed thugs.
Highlight: Lois' reaction to Craig's confession of love

Stilts - Malcolm gets a humiliating gig at Lucky Aide as a greeter on stilts.
Highlight: the aforementioned stilt fight

Watching the Baby - While watching Jamie, Hal tries to get diapers and Reese and Malcolm are approached by popular girls.
Highlight: Dewey's bedtime story

Not much more I can say but I hope that the rest of the show finds its way to DVD. Fox has clearly lost interest (schmucks), but maybe Shout! Factory can lend a hand.


Thursday, January 07, 2010

Random thoughts - the movies of 2009.

First favorite things in movies - 2009:

Adrien Brody and Rachel Weisz dance a Bolero to Nino Rota's Amarcord in The Brothers Bloom

The appearances of Columbus' rules in Zombieland

Carrie Fisher in Sorority Row

Chev Chelios (Jason Statham) whistles Mike Patton's theme music while on patrol in Crank: High Voltage

Demetri Martin gets a police escort to Woodstock in Taking Woodstock

The dog-sitting inventions in Hotel for Dogs

Ed Helms' friendship song in The Hangover

Emile Hirsch in Taking Woodstock

The Guggenheim shootout in The International

"I’m gonna be keeping my eye on you!" - Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs

John C. Reilly and Willem Dafoe in Cirque du Freak: the Vampire’s Assistant

John Dillinger (Johnny Depp) nearly gets caught in a packed movie house in Public Enemies

Just about everything in Fantastic Mr. Fox, especially the characters' animalistic traits and Kylie's consciousness signal

Keith David in Coraline and The Princess and the Frog

Liam Neeson in Taken

Martin Starr in Adventureland

Matt Damon's narrative tangents in The Informant!

Michael Douglas and Robert Forster in Ghosts of Girlfriends Past

The montage of Rachel Weisz's hobbies in The Brothers Bloom

The opening montage (and Michael Giacchino's accompanying music) in Up

Pete Wiggins talks about the breathing habits of babies in Away We Go

Several moments of lush animation in Ponyo

The staring contest in Shorts

Steve Coogan charges through the White House lawn in Night of the Museum: Battle for the Smithsonian

They Might Be Giants' "Other Father Song" in Coraline

The 34th and 35th days in (500) Days of Summer

Thomas Lennon in 17 Again

Timothy Olyphant in A Perfect Getaway

The very first con in The Brothers Bloom


- Can we please have a moratorium on bitching about the 'Julie' half of Julie & Julia? What I'm basically saying is that they were equally good, not equally orgiastically awesome (popular opinion on the 'Julia' half). If nothing else, Amy Adams, in spite of a severely unflattering hairstyle, is her usual winning self.

- Shorts was a modestly amusing effort from Robert Rodriguez. One of my favorite aspects was revealed in the trailer, as Toe theorized that Helvetica bullies him because she's secretly in love with him. Her response? "How!" before her goons dump him in the trash. (You see that, John A. Davis and Craig Bartlett? Not every girl who treats a boy like crap secretly likes him. Sometimes, they have emotional problems.) Seeing the film, I was a bit apprehensive that Rodriguez would end up drinking the Kool-Aid and having Toe and Helvetica hook up. Thankfully, that was not to be. By the end, they're "not quite enemies, but not quite friends". Good enough for me.

- The second half of The Invention of Lying ran aground rather distressingly, as the first half was a riot. In particular, the two cameos took me completely by surprise.

- Ode to fetish fuel: there was not one, but two movies where girls were revealed to have tails: Alice (Isabel Lucas) in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen and Rebecca (Jessica Carlson) in Cirque Du Freak: the Vampire's Assistant. Also, this isn't my favorite fetish, but who wasn't a little excited at seeing Susan burst out of her wedding dress and then the church in Monsters vs. Aliens?

- People can say what they want about Law-Abiding Citizen (though I did like Gerard Butler rocking an American accent), but there's a you'll-know-it-when-you-see-it moment in the film can't buy the 'Holy fuck!' reaction that this moment got from me and others at the screening I attended.

- There were an alarming number of trailers this year that (however out of context) revealed endings. Ponyo's trailer contained the final frames of the film for some reason. The trailer for The International seemed to give away the ending, but, surprisingly, the film's coda differed from what was spoiled. The Last House on the Left's ending was tipped in its trailer as was Gerard Butler's fate in Law-Abiding Citizen (though that made for a fairly cool ending to the trailer).

- As with any movie year, 2009 had its share of overrated movies (like Extract, Where the Wild Things Are and Away We Go). The quick-fix, easy-way-out would be to jump on The Hangover (and, let's face it, it was somewhat overrated, though the chemistry of the leads overcame the hit-and-miss jokes), but the most overrated movie of the year, to me, was Adventureland. I look at this film taking up space in top ten lists and I think, 'did we see the same movie?' I blame the marketing as much as the film; they made it look like 'a laugh riot from the director of Superbad'. I did laugh, though. Martin Starr and Bill Hader performed a daring (if not unsuccessful) two-man rescue operation on this film. Subtract them, though, and all you have is a dull love story involving Columbus and the moody chick from Panic Room, interrupted by "hilarious" (note the quotations) interludes featuring an unfunny fuckwit named Frigo, whose character trait is punching people in the junk. Some saw him as the break-out character of the film, whereas I saw him as right up there with the Party Crasher as one of the biggest douchebags in the history of film.

- The year was rich in guilty pleasures, from the gleefully guiltiest (Sorority Row) to the shamefully enjoyable (Ninja Assassin, Crank: High Voltage, 12 Rounds). And then, there were those that just missed the boat (Gamer, The Final Destination).

- Now, I love a good revenge flick, but I came across three movies that show the dark side of revenge. The Last House on the Left was not an easy film to watch, not for the dehumanizing of the two girls nor for the way the dehumanizers were dispatched (Aaron Paul's death, in particular, was cringeworthy). Law-Abiding Citizen presented a man's quest for revenge...but this man gradually became the bad guy. And yet, in the opening scene, we see his family murdered. What can we glean from this, exactly? Maybe Taken isn't technically a revenge film (Maggie Grace wasn't killed, but how different a film would it have been if she was?), but the basic man-plows-through-adversaries-to-right-a-wrong template is there. I really hope that these films don't have any bearing on my writing; if someone's getting revenge, it should be somewhat fun to watch. Make of that what you wish.

- I think I was a little hard on Pink Panther 2. It's still not a great movie, but, compared to some other comedies, it's not so bad. However politically incorrect it was, it was slightly amusing to hear the expression 'my yellow friend', a nod to the Sellers movies. Also, if you lose interest in the story (and who could blame you?), there's always Aishwarya Rai's legs to stare at and they're awesome.

- I think that the biggest missed opportunity of the year occurred in Race to Witch Mountain. Ciaran Hinds kept taking calls from a mysterious person throughout the film. Given the amount of in-jokes the film had, I'm disappointed that the mysterious person was not shown to be Christopher Lee. Come on, think about it.

- I'm astonished. After 15 years, Liev Schreiber still looks good in drag.

- As much as I enjoyed Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, I must admit that the nervous smile and dumb girl talk that Sam did every time she started waxing scientific drove me crazy every time. I don't know, it reminded me too much of the nervous smile that Helga of "Hey Arnold!" would give whenever she was caught in one of her random acts of crazy.

- In Monsters vs. Aliens, when the aliens attacked after the President made contact by playing "Axel F", I couldn't help but think, 'Maybe they're Giorgio Moroder fans'.

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Friday, January 01, 2010

Watching "Mexican Boarders" on Cartoon Network West (thank you, Dish Network). A Speedy Gonzales cartoon on television in the 21st century?! Why not? We've got a Black president. Anything's possible, at this point.


I'd like to say that I'm somewhere right now getting kissed as the year passes. Actually, I am where I've always been on New Year's for the last few years: sitting at home reading fanfiction and watching TV while other people have lives. Yeah.