"I would not say such things if I were you!"

Yesterday, I attended the screening of The Princess Bride with music played by live orchestra. The seating was insane and the parking was a nightmare, but I made it. Damn good thing these things don't start on time.

- I'd heard about The Princess Bride with music by a live orchestra a few years ago. As much as my hometown sees, I feared it would be something I'd dream about, but never get to experience for myself unless I sacrifice hundreds of dollars in travel expenses (hint, hint, David Newman's Matilda).

- The conductor was an affable fellow, sharing stories about meeting Peter Cook (the Impressive Clergyman) and alternate casting choices like Arnold Schwarzenegger as Fezzik (...no) and Danny DeVito as Vizzini (as indelible as Wallace Shawn is in the role, I would actually like to see that). However, he totally reminded me of Elmer Fudd in "A Corny Concerto". 

- Mark Knopfler's music was re-orchestrated by Mark Graham, who's worked on a bunch of scores for Alan Silvestri and Alexandre Desplat, among others, so the sound was in good hands.

- Now, I'm not a hater of Knopfler's synthesized score nor am I a great fan, but there's something about the original execution that felt of the film, if that made any sense. In particular, I really missed the guitar trills for when Inigo shows off the scars that the Six-Fingered Man left him.

- Still, the sword fight music really popped with an orchestra, However...

- Maybe, it was the sound mixing or the placement of music where there originally was none, but there were moments of overscoring that drowned out the dialogue, in particular "I ought to be after twenty years.".

- "A few steps from here and we'll be safe in the Fire Swamp." Nicely played, Billy Goldman.

- During the Westley vs. Rodent of Unusual Size fight, I noticed two things: a) I kind of was hoping that the ROUS would've met the tip of Westley's sword sooner than it did and b) Buttercup was not much help in that fight. Maybe not useless the way, say, Tiffany Case was in the climax of Diamonds Are Forever, but still, she could've bashed the ROUS with the club. (Something to take away as a writer: just because the woman is a damsel, they don't have to be a damsel-in-distress.) Still, this was mitigated by the way she bargained for Westley's life with Count Rugen and Prince Humperdinck.

- Thinking about damsels reminds me of the double feature I did last year of 21st century movies where the young leads were cast as fairy tale villains. While Damsel had Robin Wright coldly glower (and not much else) as the wicked Queen, Ella Enchanted greatly benefited from Cary Elwes chewing the scenery as Edgar, though even now, I'm forced to wonder how - given that he had a talking snake sidekick and an almost permanent sneer on his face - no one pegged the character as a bad guy earlier.

- Following Westley recognizing Count Rugen as the Six-Fingered Man and him getting knocked out, there was an intermission. Maybe not that relevant, but I felt it was worth mentioning, mainly because of the cute girls in line ahead of me and the king-sized Kit Kat I picked up.

- I kind of wish I had taken down track listings of the pieces used. It's kind of a quirk of mine.

- The audience was laughing at a lot of the movie, which I can't say I was terribly upset by; this is a very funny movie. Still, my biggest laugh: "Give us the gate key." "I have no gate key." "Fezzik, tear his arms off." "Oh, you mean this gate key."

- Likewise, there were a lot of cheers when Inigo ended Rugen. Thinking about it, it's not hard to share the kid's frustration that Humperdinck lived because he was arguably worse: planning to kill Buttercup and turning the machine up to 50 on Westley. Even Rugen was horrified at this; he only wanted to go as high as 5. Granted, stiffing Inigo's father on the sword and murdering him were awful, but he could not have imagined the son carrying that hate in his heart.

- Overall, the experience was a good one. The movie still holds the power to enthrall young and old. The music...the orchestral execution was an interesting one, but it only emphasized how thin the score was on a melodic front. Besides 'Storybook Love', there wasn't anything to grab onto in terms of themes. Maybe, the swordfight theme and the little comic idea for Inigo and Fezzik. I'm glad I went, though. Don't get it twisted.

Seven days without food makes one weak.

Okay, here’s an odd little feature I want to bring to the blog. Whenever I’m too bored to post track listings are too lazy for…anything else, I’m just gonna tell you about the week I’ve had eating. This may seem not that fascinating, but a) writer Jane Espenson did it all the time on her blog and nobody said a word and b) eating is one of the few things in this world I know how to do well, so I may as well get some use out of it. (This was from November 1st to November 7th. I kinda lost interest in this as the month went on, but I still feel I should post this one.)

Saturday - While checking out the ‘Best breakfast sandwiches’ page on Step Out Buffalo, I happened upon a place called Public Espresso. That was another place I had in mind, but that morning, I had an important appointment, so I figured if there’s a location close to my appointment place, sure, let’s give it a shot. There’s something on the menu called the Slam Dunk that advertises protein, eggs, and the choice between toast and hotcakes. I decided to order it online. In the course of the order, I’m given a choice between bowl and burrito. At no point does it ever cross my mind as unusual that these are the choices that this meal is being offered as. I order a burrito because it’s a breakfast burrito. Those are cool, right? I pick up the order from the place and then make my way home. I unwrap it and I find that it’s a burrito. I wasn’t expecting it to be, you know, offered to me separately on a plate or anything...and really, why would that be an issue for anybody? It’s all going to the same place, anyway, right?. Serving these things together as a burrito - much less eating them that way - is certainly a choice but, as I power through it, I find it’s pretty good. I mean, it’s rather unorthodox to be sure, but it’s still pretty tasty. Next time, though, I think I’ll get the bowl.

Lunch/dinner is a bit more conventional as I enjoy half of a steak sub that I couldn’t finish the night before. About 15 minutes in the oven makes the bread nice and crispy and a sliced dill pickle makes for the perfect topper.

Sunday - As a means of building of strength for another appointment I had to go to later that day, I got a sausage, egg and Swiss croissant sandwich from Wendy’s. I thought about getting something from the two for $3 meal menu, but those offerings were just too bare bones: egg and cheese biscuit, sausage biscuit...but then again, I could’ve put them all in one sandwich and just saved the biscuit for dinner next time.

To build my strength up after my appointment, I ordered some corndog nuggets at the theater while going to see KPOP Demon Hunters (tl;dr - the hype is real). My last conscious memory of having these things was when I went to see Final Destination 5 and the remake of Fright Night in a double feature (at the very same movie theater!). I just love mixing up the ketchup and the mustard in the designated condiment space. It makes the nuggets taste so much better.

For dinner, I had a pork chop, baked beans and potato salad. No bread, though, and come to think of it, that spare biscuit would’ve been so helpful.

Monday - Not much to write home about, breakfast-wise. Just a bowl of cinnamon and spice oatmeal, with just enough water for it to be appetizing. Too much and you end up with cringe-inducing oatmeal soup. Blergh! Even the sound of its name (which I just invented) inspires wanting to puke. Sidebar: why did Quaker stop selling this flavor in its own box? The only way you can get it is in the Flavor Variety Pack. It tastes so good. It’s not fair.

Well, it’s National Sandwich Day and I need to do something special. I order ahead to a deli downtown. Usually, I get egg salad sandwiches, but today called for tuna. Whole or half? Eh, treat yourself. Lettuce, tomato, onion and Muenster cheese for flavor. Given that I only have a half-hour lunch break and parking downtown is…not available, I take a real risk with this place, but it’s worth it. Instead of the chips at the place, I clean out the rest of the Herr’s Honey Cheese puffs. All together, an exceptional meal.

For dinner, I’m leery of spending any more money until pay day, so I’m stuck at home. I still have some frozen pierogies in the freezer…but no sour cream. Damn. Only two Stouffers dinners left and they aren’t on sale this week. Also, I’m not much of a cook. My only hope is the other half of the tuna sandwich I was saving for tomorrow’s lunch. I guess I should. It’s still National Sandwich Day. The sandwich pairs well with the Loaded Taco Doritos I had just bought.

Tuesday - Every so often, usually when I’m working at home, I find myself chowing down on snacks instead of getting a healthy breakfast. Sadly, this was one of those days. I popped a couple of fun-sized Twix from Halloween night. In fact I’ve been eating quite a bit of candy from the last few days: one bag that I bought for the trick or treaters (Twix) and one from the post-Halloween sale (Reese’s pumpkins). Better than eating nothing, I suppose.

For lunch, I got a package of Sweet Chili ramen noodles. Usually, I get teriyaki beef and teriyaki chicken, but I tried something different. Sometimes, it works out and sometimes, it doesn’t. As usual with these cuppa noodles, I try to spice it up with fried onions and chipotle sauce. As ever, it succeeds.

Dinner is spaghetti and meatballs with Texas toast. Not very fancy, but it’s really good. Sometimes, that's all you need.

Wednesday - I got a day off. Pretty random as they tend to get when I'm backed into a corner and have to take them off or risk losing them. I knew I wanted a sweet and savory breakfast, but too many places offer either or for a reasonable price. I then remembered that there was a free coupon for a free Grand Slam from Denny’s, so off I went. It wasn’t bad. The hash browns were crispier than usual and, overall, I enjoyed it. I’d still rather eat elsewhere, but for the price…not bad.

After a few errands, I feel like KFC for lunch. I pick up a 3pc tenders meal, but instead of my usual honey mustard dipping sauce, I choose ranch and…it’s just not the same. Seriously, what the hell was I thinking?

Maybe, it’s the surplus of calories I had earlier in the day or just general laziness or not wanting to use up one of my dinners (or all of the above), but I am not up to anything for dinner more taxing than finishing off my bag of BBQ Doritos. Deal with it.

Thursday - I'm at home today. I'm pretty sure I ran out of candy and I didn't feel like doing the oatmeal ritual, so I made do with that classic Spanish dish called nada. Not very nourishing, but it's low-fat.

To overcompensate for the lack of breakfast, I decide on Burger King for lunch. Not easy to get it done in half an hour, but I manage, with a Whopper, onion rings and a Coke. Also, you got to have that zesty sauce for the rings.

As the day goes on, Mom decides to get wings. Not really the biggest fan, but I don’t feel like starving. The choices you’re forced to make.

Friday - As I am wont to do when I'm craving something sweet, I grab a bag of chocolate donut holes from Paula's (and, if I'm lucky and it's near enough to closing time, I get more than the advertised dozen; got to deplete that stock, somehow). Not the healthiest of breakfast foods, but it is readily available. Grabbing something healthy takes work and I only have so much energy for that.

For lunch, I make some Sweet Chili ramen and spice it up with chipotle sauce and fried onions. Hey, that's how I like it.

That night, I went to see Predator: Badlands. It was all right, if not up to the best movies in the series. I sneak in a box of Reese's pieces and a bag of Lesser Evil popcorn then wash it down with a medium root beer from the concession stand. As long as they keep telling us that their primary means of income comes from the snack bar, I'll keep buying. Tasty as that is, though, it's not dinner. My mind has, for some reason, latched onto the idea that Mighty Taco still has fish burritos as they did years ago. I drive over to one, only to find that they no longer sell fish products. Shit. Well, as long as I'm here, I grab a Super Mighty burrito, park in a nearby space and wolf it down. Not much else I can do. I drive home, a feeling of mild disappointment clogging the air. Hell, maybe things can get better the next week.